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How to overcome insecurity about looks

In fact, several studies by psychologists Mario Mikulincer and Phillip Shaver have found that inducing feelings of attachment security in adults can help overcome some of the negative effects of an insecure attachment history. But if you make yourself powerful, you can always rebuild, overcome, and keep moving forward by your own will, and find happiness wherever you go. Think of the success you've had in school, the great friendships you've maintained, or just of random times when you made a group of people crack up because of your winning sense of humor. But when Mikulincer and Shaver had insecurely attached people think of someone who made them feel safe and secure, those research participants demonstrated more care and compassion toward people in need. Instead of focusing on all the times you embarrassed yourself, failed at something, or just looked silly, you should take a long hard look at all the times that you've done really well. Read them over and ask yourself how many of them are rational, and how many are just a product of negative thinking. Life is constantly changing and anything that is stable today may be broken or gone tomorrow. Write down all of the things that you are worried about, and all of the factors that make you feel like you can't accomplish a thing. But does that mean that people who grow up with "insecure attachments" are condemned to a life of unhappiness?

How to overcome insecurity about looks


Don't let these silly worries stop you from trying something different. Once you realize that the worst isn't really that bad, you'll be more likely to be dynamic and to take risks. It's unnatural, however, to be so plagued with worry that you feel like you can't get a single thing done. In the case of trying to decide whether or not to jump the grand canyon on a motorbike, this is a very good quality. Life is constantly changing and anything that is stable today may be broken or gone tomorrow. Ask yourself, "What's the worst that could happen? But does that mean that people who grow up with "insecure attachments" are condemned to a life of unhappiness? If you get a new haircut and a few people don't like it, then it's unlikely to end of the world. Couple huggingNot necessarily, according to recent research. Think about what you would tell another person in your situation. Trailblazing research by Jeffry Simpson at the University of Minnesota offers more grounds for optimism. Simpson and his colleagues have studied relationships where at least one partner has an insecure attachment style. For instance, insecurely attached people generally display less kind, helpful or "pro-social" behavior toward others. Adjusting Your Perspective 1. Write down your fears. Read them over and ask yourself how many of them are rational, and how many are just a product of negative thinking. They have found that when people with an anxious attachment style have a romantic partner who consistently seems committed to them, they feel less anxious and insecure. Write down all of the things that you are worried about, and all of the factors that make you feel like you can't accomplish a thing. Keep a success journal at your desk and fill it up with proud achievements and fond memories. See how many of your fears you can tackle, and how many positive solutions you can think of for all of the things that are worrying you. But when Mikulincer and Shaver had insecurely attached people think of someone who made them feel safe and secure, those research participants demonstrated more care and compassion toward people in need. Take the time to really think of what's at the root of your fears — whether it's making a fool of yourself, disappointing your parents, or not having the life you want. Can We Overcome Insecure Attachment? People in the study who felt securely attached to their parents seemed more soothed in a stressful situation when their partner provided emotional care, such as by being nurturing, expressing emotional intimacy, or encouraging them to talk about their emotions or experiences relevant to the problem. Think of the success you've had in school, the great friendships you've maintained, or just of random times when you made a group of people crack up because of your winning sense of humor.

How to overcome insecurity about looks


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1 comments

  1. But in daily life, being too insecure to attempt even small tasks, such as speaking honestly to friends, limits your ability to enjoy the time you have on earth.

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